Almost, But Not Quite There Yet

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When life throws you a curve, what do you do?  We are faced with making many decisions on a daily basis, some minor, others life-changing ones.  How do you decide which course of action to take?  Do you rush into it with emotions running high?  Do you take a step back and think things through?

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Lately, I’ve been pondering the decisions that I’ve made within the past several months.  Were they good ones…well it’s hard to say.  From my perspective, it might’ve been the wrong ones.  I think the past several decisions were based purely on emotions and in hindsight I should’ve taken a breather before jumping headlong into a predicament that exacerbated what was already a stressful situation.

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As always, I live and learn.  My comfort is in the fact that I have the power to do something about it and that it’s not something that’ll last forever.  No matter how bad the situation I’m in, I’ll find a way to resolve it.  I just need to look for the little signs that God has placed for me to find.  Once I can identify them and learn from it then it’ll be when I can move on.  Life is way too short to just give up and be content with where you are.

Granted I’ve made mistakes that led me to where I am today, but I have faith that this is the path that God designed for me.  I am eternally hopeful that this will ultimately lead me to where I was truly meant to be.  As long as I keep the faith, stay positive and persevere, I’ll be just fine.   

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Your Test Of Strength

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When the chips are all down

and your luck has run out,

take several steps back

cast aside any doubt

 There are often times

when things don’t go your way,

you choose wrong, you fail

making mistakes throughout the day

 You’ve just hit a rough patch

in this journey called life,

just roll with the punches,

bid adieu to the strife

 In the midst of this insanity

there’s always a ray of hope,

that light at the end of the tunnel

is what helps you to cope

 You’ll get through this dilemma

and will reach the other side,

problems encountered hereafter

is taken all in stride

 Take pride in yourself

you’ve fought the good fight,

your character has mettle,

inner strength shown outright

So take charge of your life

when things go awry,

head straight forward, show no fear

wave those bad days goodbye.

My Meaning In Life

 

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There are times

when I often wonder

“What is my purpose in life?”

This conundrum,

this perplexing dilemma

hinders my daily progress

“Do I continue as I’ve been?”

“Or do I alter my path?”

With deep contemplation

and extensive introspection

I’ve learned that

I have no real true goal

As long as I let my heart

guide my intentions

and lead my actions,

my journey has meaning

Striving not for

fame, wealth or success,

but achieving self-worth,

being of value,

spreading my love and light

Contributing to the pool

of goodwill and positivity

in this world

is what I was meant to do.

Midlife Reflections #5

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Looking back on everything I’ve done in my life, whether it be good or bad, there are definitely things that I would’ve done very differently.  But I guess that’s how we all would feel if given the power of hindsight.  Some would say that what we did was supposed to happen in order for us to learn a lesson or set us on the right path to where we’re going to end up. 

For someone like me who’s a control freak, especially when it comes to my choice of jobs, it’s truly frustrating when you’ve made a bad choice.  After making that critical decision, whether intentionally, hastily or ill-informed, it feels like an eternity trying to get my life back on track.  Everything seems to be in overdrive just to get back to normalcy; but now every turn, every move I make I second guess myself. 

“I shouldn’t have done this!”

“What the hell was I thinking?!”

“What have I gotten myself into?!”

“Am I going to get out of this jam? And when!?”

All these thoughts run a continuous loop in my head and I beat myself up over making that error in judgement.  We’re all human, but I have high expectations of myself and feel like the whole world just came crashing down on me.  I feel trapped with no option in sight.  

We talk to our family and friends about our predicament to get their advice but it turns into a therapy session where we pour our hearts out in hopes of a quick and easy solution.  We’ve all been there…and we’ll all go there again. 

The one thing that keeps me afloat is the prospect of something better on the horizon.  Yeah, I don’t know how long it’ll take to reach that destination but the idea of finding something better keeps that hope alive.  AND I always hold out for hope!  I always err on the side of positivity.  Why?  Because at my lowest point, that’s all I can do.  It’s much better than the alternative; I can’t just give up.  Throwing in the towel and being resigned to the fact that I failed somehow is not an option. 

There is always a way out of every predicament I put myself in.  Strength and faith is all I need to have to know that it’ll all work out in the end.  Nothing’s impossible to overcome, I just have to be willing to take the first step forward…AND I just did.    

When It Feels Scary To Jump…

While channel surfing couple years ago, I happened upon a channel that featured a 2014 movie called “A Most Violent Year”.  Although I consider myself a movie buff, I’ve never really heard of this movie until that one fateful day.  I won’t tell you what the plot was because I stumbled upon it and really didn’t watch it till the end.  But I did happen upon a scene where a man by the name of Abel Morales said “When it feels scary to jump, that is exactly when you jump, otherwise you end up staying in the same place your whole life.”

This one line totally resonated with me and I just had to write it down.  I turned off the TV and soaked in those words.  I took it to heart and it quickly became etched within my subconscious.  You could almost say that I had an epiphany of some sorts.

This one quote, this one line from a movie I have never seen told me that in life, you need to take chances regardless of the outcome.  There are times when you’ll succeed and there are times when you’ll fail, but you must learn from it in order to grow into the person that you were meant to be.  Life is too short to play is safe, it needs to be explored with eyes wide open.  Life if full of endless possibilities with the potential to be great.

I took this to heart and felt that I needed to try anything even if it took me out of my comfort zone.  I lived by the code of being open to different things; doing so would broaden my horizons both mentally and physically.  Living by this way of thinking helped me to try different things; just facing the impossible or the uncomfortable with complete abandonment.  Living this way made me realize that to do these things require both strength and faith; the will to pursue what your heart desires with the self-confidence to know that you’ll achieve something positive from it regardless of the results.

Ever since then, I’ve been bestowed with nothing but great outcomes.  I dared to take a chance and came out a winner so to speak; I count my blessings everyday for doing so.  So if you are faced with doing something that takes you out of your comfort zone, go all in and bet on yourself.  The first step will be scary, terrifying even…but the end results will be much more rewarding.  Take that leap and dare to be great!