Some write songs
of love old and new,
others write books
of love so grand and true
But songs and books cannot describe
the real true meaning of love,
a love that comes from inside
From within the heart
a certain feeling grows,
it cannot be hid
for through your action it shows
It’s seen in the eyes
of both the young and old
It’s shown through their smile
that’s pure and gold
If everyone had one wish
they’d probably say,
“Love stay with me forever,
never go away.”
I always marvel at the fact that we, as writers, can conjure up practically anything we desire with our writing. We come up with the most creative stories, the most enticing screenplays, the most eloquent poetry and the most humorous prose.
No two stories, poems, blog posts or screenplays are alike. Yes they may have the same idea or premise but the way it is executed on page and presented to the reader is very individualistic. Our inner voice comes through our choice of words and how we arrange them and the reader is fortunate to choose which voice he or she best relates to.
We really have a gift if you think about it and we choose to share it with others in hopes of educating them, inspiring them, entertaining them and even provoking critical thought among them. Our passion has no bounds.
The world, our experiences, our family, our friends and random conversation overheard is our muse. We get a spark and it gestates in our subconscious mind until it is ready to flow freely onto our computer screens.
AND some of the stuff that we come up with is totally mind-boggling. As writers, we choose to ignore the plausible and go with what our inner voice is screaming at us to write. Just imagine if we put limitations on ourselves and our creativity, you know how boring our concepts would be.
Every day I thank God that I’m able to write something that at least someone, somewhere would enjoy reading. I might not be the most creative, eloquent or concise writer but I write how I feel and that’s all that truly matters; I think that this is the common thread that is prevalent among all of my fellow peers.
Writing is our craft, our voice…and our desire to share it with the world regardless of the outcome is admirable don’t you think. 
When I started as a writer, I came across a poem that really spoke to me. Unfortunately it was written anonymously and I lost my only copy of it. But I remembered a portion from that particular poem that I took to heart and I want to share it with all of my fellow writing colleagues – all you screenwriters, poets, bloggers, story tellers:
“Writing is a gift
given to few,
Don’t ever give it up
or you won’t be you”
Today as I am writing this blog, I am in complete shock at the fact that my daughter is turning 16 years old today (AND also at the fact that I’m someone’s dad). I truly cannot believe that my first born child is slowly growing into a young woman. This is the very child whom I cradled in my arms in the wee morning hours trying to get her to sleep.
Yes I know that it’s inevitable, but I’m amazed at how time flew by. It’s as if I’m in a water tube slide and the laws of physics temporarily sped up; all the events that I shared with my daughter were merely subconscious flashbacks appearing before my eyes as I descended to the bottom.
“WOW!!!” is all I can say. To see this strong, intelligent and ambitious girl attaining goals and dreams that I would never dare to do is completely mind-boggling…maybe I’m awed at that fact that I share DNA genes with her. Every day I am surprised at what she is capable of doing and am truly proud.
I guess the whole point of this post is just me reflecting on the past and how I relish my experiences as a parent with my children. I’m not the best parent in the world but I’m definitely not the worst by any means. I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way and grew as a person, but I feel like I did an okay job.
I look forward toward the future and am anxiously awaiting for my daughter and son to astonish me, whether it be something big or something small. It is because of them that I am inspired to do things and explore things that will surprise them as well. Hopefully along the way I can slow down time and defy the laws of physics to savor every moment.
Are you the answer to my question?
Could it be you my love?
It makes me crazy wondering
if it’s you that’s my true love?
You give so much of yourself
to remind me that love is near
To search the feeling within my heart
will make it crystal clear
You’re the person, my answer,
my one and only love
You’re a gift sent special to me
straight from heaven above
To find an answer to true love
I needn’t go to far
For your heart reflects true love within and…
All that you are
Your sweet, caring smile
your warm and honest face
the caress of your loving hands
your soft and gentle embrace
You opened up my eyes
and turned my life around
You made me see true beauty,
showed me new joys abound
All because of you-
my dreams are close at hand,
my life is much more clearer,
my love is oh so grand
The warmth and kindness that you gave,
the strength you instilled in me,
your heart and soul is with me now-
with you I’ll always be
I’ve never known anyone
who could do these things to me,
You’ve shown me what love’s all about
you’ve taught the blind to see
The reflection in your eyes show me
that together, our love will go far,
for love reflects true beauty and…
All that you are
You’re a gift that’s truly priceless,
an angel from above
a heart filled with true beauty,
with an endless supply of love
All that you are,
all because of you,
my love has found a special place
my dearest, I love you.
Did you ever have those times when you had a dry spell with your writing? Whether it be for your blog, script, story, essay, correspondence letter or note to a friend, your mind’s well was empty. No topics are in play, no words come to mind, things just don’t flow freely from pen to paper so to speak.
It’s like you struggle just to get a cohesive sentence together; every brain cell is squeezed to spew out the words needed to bring forth a sentence. AND the kicker is that it’s really not what you want to convey. You just put something down for the sake of having something substantial to work from.
All of us as writers hit this dry spell throughout our careers, it’s inevitable and just plain sucks. During these times I just don’t feel like a writer and I truly feel as if I failed. Don’t know why, but I just do.
“Why does this have to happen?!”
Our minds are capable of doing and creating so much more…so why is it that our minds fail us? Is it just a way of our brain telling us that it’s going on a short vacation so we can’t write until it gets back?
What do we do in the meantime? How do we continue on with our craft if our mind isn’t cooperating? Not writing anything makes me feel empty and having to endure this drought is challenging. Often during times like these is when I start to worry…has my mind’s well of creativity gone dry? Will I ever come up with another idea or story ever again? 
So many questions with no immediate answers. My confidence gets put through the ringer and then some. But luckily for me, I’ve been through this rodeo and I know that I just need to ride out the storm.
My mind eventually regains its composure and my creativity resets itself. My brain becomes cognizant of all the new ideas and stories and starts to file them in my intellectual storage file; the amount of information is so overwhelming that I’m faced with another dilemma…which story to work on first, too little time to get all this stuff out and words constantly oozing out just begging to be put on page.
Guess that’s a better situation to be in than a writing dry spell but either way I’ll gladly endure both as long as my passion for writing remains constant.
All my life, I’ve lived so alone
searched and failed each time,
so many hearts drifting alone
not one to call my own
The feeling of love was all but a dream
seen in the eyes of others,
hearts that will share, eyes that show care
as only between two lovers
Since you walked into my life
my faith has grown so strong
my view of love is much clearer now
with you is where I belong
You’re the reason how my life is lived
and this I know is true
There can only be one love for me
cause love was found in you
You taught me things in life
and I have learned to give –
to loneliness I bid sweet adieu
The love that has filled me body and soul
is all because of you
You’re the reason – my heart I give
my love’s now alive and free
For you are my one and only love,
you are the one just for me.
Ever have one of those days when things just don’t seem to go your way or situations pop up that test your limits? We’re all faced with that time and time again; believe me, I’ve had my share ten times over and then some. There are other that have it even worse.
What I’m most curious about is how others cope with their personal struggles. How do they keep positive in light of all the bad things that are happening to them? What gives them the drive to face their dilemma head on and never give up?
When problems arise in my life, my “doom and gloom meter” starts to rise and my mind starts to go into overdrive about all the things I could’ve done to avoid this mess. My outlook starts to look depressingly hopeless and my daily routines are all out of whack.
I start to do normal things on auto-pilot all the while racking my brain on how to solve my problems or obstacles so that I can get back on track and live normally again.
When this happens, I start to get into a funk and feel like “Why does this always happen to me and when will it all end! Can’t I just get a break?!” Just when I see there is no solution to my turbulent mess, “a spark of hope” appears out of nowhere.
For me, that can come in the form of my dog greeting me at Mach speed with unconditional love and adoration. A big bear hug from my wife. It can even come from watching my kids simply do their homework or observing family members go about their daily routine. It’s amazing how something so small and mundane can make a difference.
Just the mere sight of them snaps me out of my much misaligned chaotic demeanor. It’s weird but seeing something like that, just soaking in those positive things gives me hope. Remembering all the good times and feeling so blessed to have a family like mine helps a lot; knowing that I overcame previous predicaments helps in the process. Maybe subconsciously I know that I have their undying love and support in my corner and I know I’m not facing my predicaments alone.
Can’t really explain it; I get a renewed sense of energy and endless possibilities about my life explode in my head…AND it’s all good. It feels as if nothing in the world can stop me from accomplishing anything and everything!
It’s funny how something so simple can become a beacon of unbridled optimism. Life doesn’t appear so bleak and I’m enthusiastically anticipating what’s in store for me in an hour, a day, a week or months from now. I begin to envision a more desirable and successful future for myself which might or might not happen. Who cares?!
My “spark of hope” is all that matters in driving my life forward. As long as I have that grain of reverie then everything is fine.
I can’t fathom how this process works but I’m just truly grateful that this “spark of hope” can do wonders for me. I just pray that this sparkle continues to light all of the dark and hard times that I’ll encounter in my life.
A twinkling in your eyes I see
in the darkness of the night,
all hurt and pain has left me now
cause I’ve finally seen the light
I don’t know how I’ve gone this far
without really knowing you,
my life has suddenly taken a turn
everything seems so new
In your eyes I see a vision,
in my heart I know it’s true
this feeling that grows from deep within
is all because of you
You’re all that I’m longing for
You’re all my dreams come true
My life would be so complete
If I could spend forever with you
It’s amazing how love really works
it’s astonishing to see,
You, out of all the strangers in the world
that was truly meant for me
Love is purely magical
in each and every way,
If my heart had a mind of its own
this is what it’ll say:
“Do you believe in magic?
I hope you really do,
cause the love that stirs from deep within
is all because of you
No part of me will let you go
You’re all my dreams come true
My life would be so complete
If I could spend forever with you”
I believe in love because
it’s special and so true,
cause it found it’s place within my heart
and I owe it all to you
I’ll always be there, by your side
You’re all my dreams come true
My love will you let me spend –
Forever With You.
I’ve been hurt too many times…
too much to count
I’m scared,
because I’m starting to feel cold inside
To have no feelings for another
is the most scariest thing to experience
That’s why I keep trying so hard
I keep coming back for more punishment,
for more heartbreak
Because to lose that feeling of caring
caring for someone…
means to die inside
Losing all the wonderful qualities
of one’s self –
Lost forever in a world of darkness.
As I rummaged through the closet looking for something that I can’t even remember, I stumbled upon my Filofax. Yes, I did say Filofax.
For those born in the 21st century, it’s a small looking folder that contains a calendar, day planner, notepad, plastic sleeves, ruler, pen holder, calculator, etc… Basically it’s a personal organizer that helps you to manage your time, appointments, meetings and tasks.
It’s really a folder that you write down all the things you need or want to do on a given day and reference it when you can’t recall what it is you were supposed to do.
Back in the 90’s it was a real popular thing to have but I resisted the urge to have one because I felt it “dumbed” you down and made you prone to not using your brain to remember things.
When I saw the movie “Taking Care of Business” with Jim Belushi and Charles Grodin, my views on the Filofax changed. I somehow became obsessed with owning a Filofax, even though I had no need for one. I caved in and bought one to my delight; “I HAD A FILOFAX AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERED!”
Since I was in college, I had nothing on my plate except for my classes; I spent money on this thing so I felt like I had to write something in the Filofax to validate me buying the damn thing.
I jotted down my class times even though I already knew the schedule by heart. I could not think of a single thing to put in it; one fateful day while in class, as the professor was droning on about God knows what, I wondered what I wanted to accomplish in my life. Now I know that people make bucket lists all the time, but I started to do this when it wasn’t something popularly spoken.
One day I had one goal, the next day another and the next day another. Soon I ended up with 4 and a half pages of things I wanted to accomplish or “Life Goals” as I called it, since I didn’t really know what a bucket list was at the time.
My list wasn’t extreme like going skydiving, bungee jumping, swimming with sharks or climbing Mount Everest; my goals centered around my career in being an established writer, getting literary representation, sell my screenplays, finding a soulmate, getting married and buying a house just to name a few.
It wasn’t exciting or glamorous but they were “MY” goals; they were all attainable only if I was committed to seeing it through. As the years flew by, that Filofax of mine soon became a fixture in an obscure corner of a book shelf and then somehow ended up in storage within my closet.
Don’t ask me how or why that had occurred, but it did. I guess somewhere along in my life things happened that caused me to forget about what I had wanted to accomplish.
So cut to the present and back to the start of this post, when I stumbled across this decrepit Filofax I immediately opened it and rifled through the pages to where I scribbled my “Life Goals”.
As I looked through the list I made 20 some odd years ago, I grabbed a pen and started to check off what I had accomplished. The ones that were accomplished put a smile on my face and satisfaction rippled down my spine. 
As for the ones that I didn’t do, I paused for a moment to wonder why that was. Clearly it was something that I can still do. “What’s stopping me?” is all that I could think of. I felt that it was still a “Life Goal” that I still want to attain.
As of this writing, I am trying my best to see things through and accomplish what I set out to do when I was a young man in college. With a little luck, hard work and dogged determination, I know I’ll check off every single one of my “Life Goals” before I take leave of this Earth.
