Midlife Reflections

Midlife Reflections #3

/ markmkane / 16 Comments

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The past couple of days, I’ve pondered on my life’s journey and what it took to get me here today.  It was a smooth ride that had numerous speed bumps and detours along the way.

I’ve had days when I hit the jackpot and everything went my way; even my mistakes and miscues resulted in a favorable outcome.

AND THEN there were those days where anything and everything went horribly wrong; where life put me in a loop and a series of jokes slapped me in the face one after another.

Regardless of what kind of day, week, month or year I had, I somehow survived; I lived to tell the tale and more often than not, I remembered in detail all of the good that I encountered.

Throughout all of my life’s experiences, I’ve come to the realization that sometimes my greatest memory can be my worst enemy.  Relishing and reminiscing about all those happy times brought about a false sense of thinking; that everything would result in something wonderful.

It was good to have a positive outlook but I needed to embrace all the bad that happened in my life wholeheartedly.  With every failed attempt I grew closer to success.

With much introspection, I’ve learned to value everything that crossed my path.  It helped me to be strong, wise, compassionate, focused, determined and grateful.  Life is way too short, so “Find the beauty in every moment” and bring out the best in yourself.

Midlife Reflections #2

/ markmkane / 5 Comments

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I look back on my life and take stock in what I’ve done and who I’ve become.  The one thing that I take most pride in is my ability to be a good listener.

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I’ve always felt that if a person takes the time to tell you something of importance, then you should respect that and give your undivided attention to what he/she has to say.  I try to listen without judgement and really hear the other person’s words.

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Too many times we’ve had and “A & B” conversation with someone but somehow ended up with “B” starting another conversation with “C & D” who just happened to pass by.  At that point, you kind of feel irrelevant and try to uncomfortably slink away without being noticed.

In my case, I stay there like a complete doofus because of some sort of self-responsibility to finish what was started.  AND when “B” returns back to the original conversation, the whole vibe is gone.

In my mind’s eye, I felt as if I was not important enough to hold your attention when I was unloading my feelings, advice and thoughts.

It is for that reason, in any conversation, that I look the other person in the eye and soak in what they’re telling me even if an outside party acknowledges me.  My focus on the person is steadfast.  This art of listening is something that I’m trying to instill in my children.

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As the days and months go by, life seems to tick away as if it were mere seconds on a clock.  Time is precious.  So when someone needs to talk to you, be there for them…and listen as if they’re the only person left on this planet.

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Midlife Reflections

/ markmkane / 6 Comments

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Back when I was much younger and starting out in the workforce, I used to think that a good paying job was the endgame to being happy and successful in life.  All that consumed me was trying to work for a company where I could climb that corporate ladder to a six figure salary; I was young, naive and dreamed big.  Little did I know that “all that glitters is not gold”.

I’ve seen people in good paying jobs but miserable as heck.  And I’ve seen the opposite, some in okay paying jobs but loving every minute of it.

Regardless of pay, we need to be happy in our jobs.  Why you may ask?  Since we spend three-quarters of the day at our place of employment, it stands to show that it’s like our second home with our second family.

If we can’t be happy there, then those feelings sometimes get transposed into our home lives.  We may not do that intentionally but it happens.  Life is too short to be miserable and stressed out.

In my current stage in life, I’ve come to the realization that life is meant to be enjoyed to its fullest.  After enduring the trials and tribulations of working many jobs, I only now know that if you’re not happy or enjoying what you do, find something that will.  Better late than never, right?

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This newfound wisdom is something that I impart on my children constantly.  So the next time you’re out job hunting, rather than asking yourself “how much does it pay?”, ponder on whether it’s something that you would “love” or “enjoy” doing for the rest of your life.  If you choose to follow the latter path, the pay will come.  Work for love, not money.

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