Family

I Always Feel Like Somebody’s Watching Me

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Back in 1984 a singer named Rockwell came out with the song “Somebody’s Watching Me” with Michael Jackson singing the chorus.  Before I go on, yes it was none other than “THE ONE AND ONLY” Michael Jackson.

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 The video starts off with a catchy but eerie tune and you see an unrecognizable face in the mirror; the whole music video featured Rockwell in his house and every time Michael sang the chorus “I Always Feel Like Somebody’s Watching Me” there was some random person out of nowhere either on the side or in the background observing Rockwell as he did his thing. 

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To this day I expect to see a creepy guy in a white wrap standing behind me off to the side like he did to Rockwell in the music video.

The most creepiest part of the video was when Rockwell was taking a shower and there was a woman, all in black, a few feet away twirling around.  The lyrics that came out during that scene was as follows:

 “When I’m in the shower
I’m afraid to wash my hair
‘Cause I might open my eyes
And find someone standing there.
People say I’m crazy
Just a little touched
But maybe showers remind me of
‘Psycho’ too much.”

 To this very day I wash my hair as quick as possible because I’m afraid that a serial killer or supernatural force will pounce on me once I close my eyes.

 The reason I bring up this song is because every so often I get the feeling that someone “is watching” me.  You know what I mean right?

 That feeling you get when you’re alone; it starts with all the hairs on your head standing up beginning with the roots and proceeds down the back of your neck onto your arms, all the while a cold chill engulfs your body as if you were dunked in ice water head first.  No one’s around but you just can’t shake that feeling that someone’s there in the room with you.  I call this the “chills down your spine phenomenon.”  It’s even worse if you have a pet and they get riled up for no reason and then the phenomenon occurs.

 Lately I’ve been having this feeling a lot; maybe it’s a “cause and effect” from watching too many reality ghost shows or I’m just a little cold.  Either way, my mind is running rampant with images of paranormal entities in my immediate vicinity.

 What else would cause this phenomenon to occur; there must be a logical reason for this but at this point I don’t think I could readily accept it. 

 All my mind can fathom is that every time the “chills down your spine phenomenon” happens, there’s either a deceased family member coming to visit or a malicious entity trying to latch onto me.

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 Granted the latter might be a bit of an overreach and bordering on paranoia but this self-reasoning somehow validates why I would get a chill running down my spine and the hairs standing on end.

 I’m sure that all of us experienced this phenomenon at some point in our lives; some may have felt the same way as I do while others simply brushed it off.  But we all can agree that when this unannounced chill overcomes us, we pause for a moment to decide what it could be.  We choose one or the other.

 I take comfort knowing that my family and friends all experienced this “chills down your spine phenomenon”; regardless of how they feel, I’ll just chalk up this feeling as grandpa or grandma coming to check up on me and making sure I’m safe and sound in this insane world.

Anime…not just animation but a “way of life”.

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Since I was a young boy, I’ve been a product of the TV generation.  It was always TV, TV, TV…could never quite get into listening to the radio to pass the time away.  For me it was, “What’s the latest thing on TV that’ll keep my attention for this week” scenario.  I was glued to the TV anxiously waiting for the latest cartoon or live action show that really and truly “WOWed” me.

 It was a time when there was no cable TV or 24 hour viewing of thousands upon thousands of channels.  It was either black & white or color TV with three or four stations that had a sign on and sign off time…this meant that television stations started their broadcast day at 5 or 6am and went dark at 12 midnight.  Believe me this really sucked and wished I could’ve been born in the 21st Century.

 But as product of growing up in Honolulu, Hawaii in the 70’s with KIKU-TV, I was fortunate to view different types of shows that the rest of the nation were not readily exposed to.  I got to see:

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Kikaida & Kikaida-01

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Rainbow Man

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Kamen Rider V-3

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Go Rangers

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Inazuman

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Denjin Zaboga

and

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Akumaizer 3

Every week I made sure that the adults knew that Saturday’s between 6-7pm was my time to watch “my” programs.  This was my world and I absolutely LOVED IT!  It was such a mind trip seeing these fantastical beings doing action stuff.

I couldn’t get enough of it.  Week in and week out my mind would wonder what each new episode would reveal.  After their run ended, the station broadened their scope and started featuring such cartoons like:

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Yuusha Raideen

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Getter Robo G

 I called them cartoons because back then that’s what they were known as “cartoons”; anime was not readily said in those times.  Watching this was a change of pace from the “live action” stuff, but was AWESOMELY COOL nonetheless.  After its run, the station starting airing more passive cartoons like

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Candy Candy

Candy Candy and Ikkyu-San; granted I gave it a shot and watched a couple of episodes but quickly decided that it was not my usual fare.  A couple years after, that station soon stopped airing kids’ shows and concentrated on more adult themed programs.

As I advanced in age, I started watching the usual stuff like G.I. Joe, Transformers, Thundercats, and Silverhawks but nothing really captured my attention as “MUST SEE.” My life felt a little hollow and there were times when I longed to be fully invested in something different again.

In the late 80’s, our household got cable; back then the viewing was not like how it is in 2016, channels didn’t quite reach the 100 mark but it was different nonetheless.

One fateful day, I flipped the channel to Fuji Television and stumbled across Hokuto No Ken (Fist of the North Star).

With eyes widened and mouth agape; I stood there in silence.  I was completely floored; the animation wasn’t as crude like it was in the 70’s and the action was off the charts.  As soon as it ended I had an “OMG WTF just happened!!!” moment.

Something stirred from within; that hollow space was now whole again and I had to watch another episode, and another, and another.  This became “MUST SEE” TV for me again.  It was my first exposure to the world of Japanese animation…I became invested in a series once again and I LIKED IT!

The series ran for a couple of years and ended to my dismay.  I was starved for more and eagerly scoured their listing for any and all new animation but no such luck.  More adult themed shows popped up again and I was back to feeling empty inside.

Fast track to the 90’s…with the advent of the internet and the progression it made, I soon stumbled across internet sites where they featured Japanese “anime” for viewing entertainment.  Now this was where I first came across the term “anime” and was awed at all the types of series that were out there.

The graphics were more refined and the movement and action were almost human-like.  This was mind-blowingly insane and there were no words to describe my thoughts.  I viewed a whole bunch of anime but was somehow drawn at the time to a series called Naruto.

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Naruto

I liked the concept and idea of the shinobi and their fighting aspects AND I thought the hand gestures to use certain jutsu’s was remarkably cool to boot.  I followed the Naruto series religiously and all of the movies in-between.

When it ended, I was depressed that I would follow the same pattern as before BUT was pleasantly surprised that it continued on in the form of Naruto Shippuden…AND there were more movies to follow as well.  I was in absolute heaven…so, this was “anime”…it was purely orgasmic to be a part of this world.

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Naruto Shippuden

Living in the 21st Century and having two kids who are into “anime” helps to broaden my horizons as well.  They introduce me to shows that they think I might like:

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One Punch Man

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Attack On Titan

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Parasyte

With a cornucopia of anime programs out there, it’s impossible to view every single one.  Having extra pair of eyes helps to filter the awesome ones from the not so interesting ones.  Such a time saver.

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I’m glad that I went on this journey of discovery (and evolution) of Japanese animation.  AND through all this, I learned that “anime” was not just a thing…but a way of life.  It was a lifestyle that I had to experience to fill a part of my soul.

1st Anniversary

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I can’t believe that one year ago I started a blog…ME of all people.  At the behest of my manager, Alexia, I needed to create a blog site to promote myself on social media.  She’s such a savy person when it comes to that so who am I to argue.

When I set up my journey on creating my site, I was a complete novice.  No experience whatsoever.  There were times when I felt like I needed to hire someone to do this for me so that I can skip all the clutter and get to the details of just writing.

I am so glad that I opted to do this on my own.  It was rough at first but soon I got the hang of the process it took to set up a site I could call my own.  Yes, you can truly “teach an old dog new tricks.”  I am in no way an expert yet but I’m still in the process of  learning all the intricacies to fixing my blog site to get it to how I want.

Once I got something up, the question was what was I going to write.  I had no clue as to what direction I was going to take.  I perused other sites and soaked in what they had to offer; soon I got to thinking that I should just write about whatever I felt like I needed to convey to anyone who would stumble across my site.

I wrote about anything and everything, my experiences, my family, my children, my pets, being a screenwriter, writing in general, poetry, what it took to be a writer, about life, pet peeves, being an eternal optimist, trying to be positive and so on and so forth.

It didn’t matter what I wrote I just needed to write.  And I made a promise that I would write something each week regardless if it was eloquent or rough around the edges.  I just needed to write.  I made this promise to myself and I intended to keep it.

Well, it’s been a year and I’m proud to say that I’ve written something every week.  I’ve kept my promise and will continue to do so until I decide otherwise.  In the scheme of things, I felt like being a blogger was therapeutic.  I got to sound off about a lot of things and was most satisfied that I got to share it…even if no one read it.  Writing was writing after all and I am trying to better myself in this craft that I love.

I’m happy I started this journey and am truly excited to see where I’ll be next year.  The future is unwritten and I’m looking forward seeing how my site will grow.  I am honored to be one of the millions of bloggers in this world expressing myself through my site.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Take two aspirins and “HUG” your pet

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We’ve all experienced a day, or days, when things just didn’t go as expected.  You know what I’m talking about…car getting a flat tire, being chewed out at work, vicious fight with our significant other, being sick to our stomach and so on and so forth. 

 It’s like we felt like the world was against us and we were the butt of a million jokes all lined up waiting to slap us in the face one after another.  We just wanted to crawl into a hole and wake up the next day as a new person who was draped with every good luck charm the world had to offer.

 It’s hard to recover from something like this. Yes it takes time and for some of us a good stiff drink. For the fortunate few that owns a pet, getting through something like this helps accelerate the process much, much faster.

 After life has beaten you to a pulp and your spirits are gone, you trudge your weary feet through the door and are greeted by your beloved pet.

 They make a mad dash for you at the speed of light and greet you like there’s no tomorrow.  Having that “warm” reception, after the day you’ve been through, helps to ease the pain and kick start the endorphin in your body into overdrive.

 They remind you that no matter what transpired “out there”, I’ll make you forget all that ever happened.  Our pets, whether it be a dog, cat, bird, hamster, pig, horse, etc., show us unconditionally what love is all about.

Just the sight of their perked up face, wagging tail and herky-jerky body movements is enough to put a smile on anyone.  Dare I say even the most hardened of faces.

 Having that unabashed feeling from this animal is a truly most extraordinary phenomenon to behold.  They make us laugh in our  darkest of days by just being themselves.  Their power to elicit all that’s happy, funny and joyful in us is just simply AMAZING.

 Being able to hold our pets and confide in them REALLY, REALLY makes our life all that more precious.  We forget all that “terrible stuff” and soon take delight in the positive.

 We no longer feel that doom and gloom and are hopeful for an exceptionally grand tomorrow.  We soon think to ourselves that “Life’s not all that bad” and our luck’s about to change for the better.  All this was because of our pet…all their positivity seeped into our core beings.  It became the perfect antidote to our dilemma.

 Our family member, our pet, that looked past all our faults and unexpected misfortunes and gave us inspiration and hope that life is best experienced together.

 So if you have a hell of a day, don’t despair…just take two aspirins and “HUG“ your pet!

That’s What Friends Are For.

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We all have friends in our lives. Some may have an army of them while others a few. Contrary to most social media apps like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat and others of the ilk where quantity determines popularity and self-value, true friendship is based on quality.

 A friend is someone who is with you through the good times and the bad. They’re there to lift your spirits up and to support you in times of crisis.

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 We have childhood friends, work friends, family friends, fair weather friends and even befriended friends of friends.  “WOW!” that’s the most that I’ve used the word friends in one complete sentence.

There are some, the “lucky ones”, that are most fortunate to have a life-long friend or friends that have been with you in all stages of your life and you in theirs. You guys, the “lucky ones”, really hit the lottery.

There’s no question that family members can be our friends; but that’s a different type of bond that goes well beyond conventional friendship.

 For the rest of us, we’ve had friends that came in and out of our lives at various points in our life.  Some we lost touch with, some that fell apart, some that passed away, some that abandoned us, some that promised to keep in contact but never do and some that just quietly drifted away.

 Despite what type of friends we have, I feel that the ones that came into our lives at any given point in time was there for a reason.  They were there to serve a purpose, and when it was fulfilled, they moved on so that we could do the same.

 There’s nothing wrong with that.  Sometimes we weren’t meant to be life-long friends with certain people; that’s okay.  In that given time span of when we started that friendship till the time it ended should be cherished whether it be good or bad.

The fact that we shared a friendship with someone is an amazing feat in itself.  We displayed an ability to give of ourselves to another to the point where they liked us enough to do the same.  If we continue to do that throughout the rest of our lives, there will be no shortage of friends.

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 We all desire friends because life’s too short to go it alone.  We need that special someone to accompany us in our life’s journey because it’s just way more fun.  Having twice the laughs, twice the craziness, twice the smiles and twice the hugs is the best reward a friend could provide.

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Babysitting

/ markmkane / Leave a comment

Babysitting is difficult and often considered a chore

To those that see this as a task will often hate it more

Watching over children is quite difficult to do,

when their screaming and yelling are all taunting you

Your patience is tried, your nerves are all bent,

you wonder and wonder where your intelligence went

“Why me?!  Why me?!” is what you will think,

The message is clear, damn you need a drink

Before that sip is taken, think back and reminisce

of those great childhood days that you so often miss

To be a child and see the fun things in life

is better than coping with the stress and the strife

Being happy, carefree, while being young and so small

is the greatest feeling to have most of all

It’s no different now than it was back before

Only thing is you understand it even more

You’ve now realized what your parents went through

You’ve known all along it would happen to you

Take heed my child for you’ve surely grown

Let this come to mind and let it be known

Your help was required because you understand and care

Your sympathy and kindness to the children should you share

So remember this poem for one day you’ll see

You’ll go through this again when you start your family.

 

 



 

			

	


			
				


	

							
Fear is the mind-killer.
						

			 / markmkane						 / 3 Comments
								

			


		

		
A quote that I often harken back to frequently in my life comes from Frank Herbert, writer of Dune.  In it there’s a quote:


“I must not fear.  Fear is the mind-killer.  Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.  I will face my fear.  I will permit it to pass over me and through me.  And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.  Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.  Only I will remain.”


The only part of the quote that is deeply embedded within my consciousness is “Fear is the mind-killer.”


That phrase always seem to pop into my head when it comes to the sudden interruptions that happen within my mundane life.  Things that I can’t control or the unknown puts me in a dazed and confused state; all rational thoughts become obscure within my psyche.


People around my usually give that same old advice, “Don’t worry about what you can’t control.”  “It’ll be okay if you just don’t think about it.”  “Everything’s gonna be fine.”


Now there are some people, the “lucky ones”,  that can glaze over these little bumps and carry on with their life, but I for one am not one of these chosen few.


Every time a “worst case scenario” presents itself, I lose all sense of myself.  Anxiety sets in and soon after fear creeps in and overtakes all of my waking thoughts.  My eternal optimistic nature just ups and leaves me fending for my life and its worth.


I tend to overthink things; I start to run every possible, and horrific, scenario in my head on how this situation, accident or illness will end.  I know that it’s not good to think like this and it certainly is not good for my health but I’m just a worrier at heart.


I just can’t seem to see the bright side of things and that’s getting me frustrated.  Only seeing the negative outcomes rather than the positive is truly destructive in nature.


To quote William Faulkner, “Fear is the most damnable, damaging thing to human personality in the whole world.”


I really believe in that but I’ve come to a point in my life where I’m just fed up feeling like this.  I know that I’m better than this and it really is true “Life is too short.”


Every time a hiccup presents itself in my life, no matter how bad, I stop to reflect how far I’ve come in life and take comfort in knowing that there are others in the world that are going through the same thing but in different degrees.  Sometimes we encounter a second, a third or even a fourth situation on top of what we’re originally dealing with.


I take stock in my family and friends and a sense of gratitude sets in.  Their smiling faces and unwavering support helped me get through the “rough times”.  It was a battle that was hard fought but I survived.  In all those instances I thought it was the worst thing ever to happen in my life, but I somehow managed to come out alright.


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Being positive in light of all the craziness that’s happening around us is a fight in itself but the results will only help to benefit our well-being.


Yes, there will be some rough patches in life where it gets solved quickly and stress free; I will treasure those the most.  And I know that there will be arduous times when the struggle will be an ongoing one with no relief in sight, but I’m training myself to see that glimmer of light at the end of that long tunnel.


No matter how dire the situation is, we really need to rely on our family and friends.  We need to get into that mindset where we should not go through this “rough patch” alone.  That is why I’m trying to adopt a new quote, “Remember the 3 P’s” to combat that “Fear is the mind-killer” lodged within my mind.


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 Staying Patient, Positive and Persisting on will help me get through any and all future obstacles life throws at me.  I will tackle it head on and be victorious!



			

	


			
				


	

							
3 Feet 2, nothing I can do.
						

			 / markmkane						 / Leave a comment
								

			


		

		
The Foster family is a very, very tall family. Dad Foster is 6 feet tall. Mom Foster is 5 feet 11. Together they had five children, three boys and a girl. The oldest child Billy is 6 feet 4. The second oldest child Chad is 6 feet 2. The third oldest child Beth is 5 feet 11. The fourth child Anna is 5 feet 10. And finally the youngest child is Ricky who was only 3 feet 2.


“3 feet 2, I’m so short there’s nothing I can do” Ricky always said with a disappointed face.


Everyday Ricky would measure his growth in the doorway, and everyday it was the same…3 feet 2. He longed for the day to be tall like his brothers and sisters. Because he was the shortest, Ricky always felt like there was nothing he could do by himself.


When Ricky wanted to read his favorite books from the tall bookshelf, he had to ask Anna to get the books for him. When Ricky wanted to drink a cup of juice, Beth always had to get a cup for him from the high cupboard. When Ricky wanted to play with his prized toy cars, he always asked Chad to bring it down for him from the top shelf of his closet. When Ricky wanted to hang his model planes from the ceiling of his room, Billy hand to string it up for him.


“3 feet 2, I’m so short there’s nothing I can do” sadly said Ricky.


Ricky decided to do something. He got four big soup cans and taped two to the sole of his right shoe and two to the left sole. He stood up and already he felt tall. Ricky tried to walk but the weight of the soup cans were too heavy. He could only move about an inch from where he stood. This was not going to work.


“I got a better idea!” exclaimed Ricky.


He took off his shoes and made a dash for his room. He brought a chair into his closet and stood on top. He parted his clothes and hung onto the clothes bar. He held on for as long as he could and then let go.


“There, that should’ve made me taller” said Ricky.


Ricky decided to make an attempt to get something that was out of his reach. He went to get some ice cream from the freezer’s top shelf. Ricky strained to reach the ice cream, just then his mom and dad appeared and plucked it off the shelf for him.


Ricky felt disappointed.


He asked his parents, “When am I going to grow and be tall like the rest of the family?”


“Why do you want to know?” said his mom.


“Because I’m only 3 feet 2. I’m so short there’s nothing I can do” replied Ricky.


“Nonsense” replied his dad.


“But it’s true. When I feel like reading my favorite book, Beth has to get it down for me. When I need a cup for some juice, Anna gets me a cup. When I want to play with my cars, Chad has to bring them down from my closet shelf. And when I change my model planes hanging on the ceiling, Billy has to do it for me.” said Ricky.


His mom looked at him and said, “You know, your dad and I as well as Billy, Chad, Beth, and Anna were all short when we were young. As we got older, we grew taller.”


His dad added, “You’ll catch up to us soon. Who knows, you might even grow up to be the tallest one in the family.”


Ricky cracked a little smile but was still disappointed that he was 3 feet 2.


One day Ricky was outside with two of his best friends, Dexter and Sam. Ricky laid on the ground and said, “Dexter, grab my hands and Sam, you grab both my feet. On the count of three, pull as hard as you can.” Dexter and Sam felt a little weird but did what Ricky asked. “One…two…THREE!” shouted Ricky. Dexter and Sam pulled, and pulled, and pulled, and pulled, until they were too tired to pull. Ricky leaped up and stood there smiling as if he were 10 feet tall.


He looked at his friends, “So do I look any taller?”


Dexter and Sam looked at him from heat to toe and both said, “No.”


Feeling defeat, Ricky decided to go inside. On his way in, he noticed the whole family huddled in a circle. Out of curiosity, he went to see what was going on. “What happened?” asked Ricky.


“I was going to do some yard work, so I took off my wedding ring to put it in my pocket. It slipped out of my hands, dropped to the ground and rolled beneath that small crevice in the corner.  I couldn’t reach it” said his mom.


“Maybe I can crawl inside to get it” said his dad. His dad tried but was too big to fit in the small space. Billy tried but was too big as well. Chad tried, and then Beth, and then Anna. Everyone was too big and tall to fit in that tiny space.


“Let me try” said Ricky.


Since he was only 3 feet 2, Ricky easily crawled into the small space and retrieved his mom’s ring. When he came out, his family cheered and congratulated him on a job well done. His mom hugged him and said, “You see, sometimes being short is not so bad. You can do things that tall people can’t do.” Ricky smiled with joy.


Later that night the whole family celebrated Ricky’s accomplishment over a hearty meal. The next day when Ricky went to measure himself in the doorway, he noticed that he was an inch taller. He was extremely happy that he grew. It wasn’t alot but that was alright by him. Ricky grinned and proudly said, “3 feet 3, I’m still short but that’s fine by me. I can do things that tall people can’t do.”


Mark Kaneshige