Take a leap of faith

Mid-Life Reflections #6

/ markmkane / 5 Comments

Live

Recently I’ve been contemplating life and reminiscing about my younger self.  When I was in my early teens on up into my 20’s, I used to wonder how I measured up to others in the world.  I would readily compare myself to family, friends, colleagues or working professionals; did I make a certain amount of income, hold a respected position in a company, have a high status in society or did something that was of importance or value to the public? 

I did my utmost to emulate them but to no avail.  I sold myself on a bill of goods that I knew was unattainable.  Why was it impossible?  It’s because they were living their life and pursuing their goals and dreams.  I had forgotten all about what I wanted to do with myself.  I was so busy worrying about catching up to them that I flat out ignored my passion, my dreams. 

When I finally woke up, I realized that I had a new lease on life.  My trajectory in this world was on a different course from everyone all together and it was my goal to make it happen.  I cared less about the status, fame and wealth of others and started to explore new things, take chances, make tons of mistakes, sought answers and learned to never give up.

It’s through this self-realization that I am where I’m supposed to be right at this moment.  It’s a never ending, constantly changing state that I’m okay with.  Why? Because it’s my life.

So don’t be so influenced by other people’s place in life that you neglect your own.  You have a destiny that needs to be fulfilled by none other than you.  So go out into the world and epically fail so that you can tremendously succeed at what you were meant to be!

Navigating the Unknown

/ markmkane / 7 Comments
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Midlife Reflections #5

/ markmkane / 2 Comments

A3

Looking back on everything I’ve done in my life, whether it be good or bad, there are definitely things that I would’ve done very differently.  But I guess that’s how we all would feel if given the power of hindsight.  Some would say that what we did was supposed to happen in order for us to learn a lesson or set us on the right path to where we’re going to end up. 

For someone like me who’s a control freak, especially when it comes to my choice of jobs, it’s truly frustrating when you’ve made a bad choice.  After making that critical decision, whether intentionally, hastily or ill-informed, it feels like an eternity trying to get my life back on track.  Everything seems to be in overdrive just to get back to normalcy; but now every turn, every move I make I second guess myself. 

“I shouldn’t have done this!”

“What the hell was I thinking?!”

“What have I gotten myself into?!”

“Am I going to get out of this jam? And when!?”

All these thoughts run a continuous loop in my head and I beat myself up over making that error in judgement.  We’re all human, but I have high expectations of myself and feel like the whole world just came crashing down on me.  I feel trapped with no option in sight.  

We talk to our family and friends about our predicament to get their advice but it turns into a therapy session where we pour our hearts out in hopes of a quick and easy solution.  We’ve all been there…and we’ll all go there again. 

The one thing that keeps me afloat is the prospect of something better on the horizon.  Yeah, I don’t know how long it’ll take to reach that destination but the idea of finding something better keeps that hope alive.  AND I always hold out for hope!  I always err on the side of positivity.  Why?  Because at my lowest point, that’s all I can do.  It’s much better than the alternative; I can’t just give up.  Throwing in the towel and being resigned to the fact that I failed somehow is not an option. 

There is always a way out of every predicament I put myself in.  Strength and faith is all I need to have to know that it’ll all work out in the end.  Nothing’s impossible to overcome, I just have to be willing to take the first step forward…AND I just did.