I count my blessings every day I wake up; I have a wonderful wife, two great kids, a loving pet, caring family members and loyal friends.  My health is going well with the exceptions of a few aches and pains but that comes with age.

Lately, however, I’ve been feeling a tad bit unfulfilled; stuck in a rut and in a funk.  My life has stalled for some reason and it’s as if there’s something lacking in my life that somehow can’t be extinguished.  I noticed that it tends to rear its head when I’m at work.

Day in and day out, I trudge into the office to work for a private corporation whose bottom line is one of financial profit instead of valuing interpersonal relations with its employees.  Those that work tirelessly are underappreciated while the slackers and less qualified upper management are praised highly for taking credit where credit is not due.

Granted the pay is good but like I said earlier, it’s lacking in substance.  I’m at that age where I want to do something that matters; to make a life changing decision.  Yes, I know that sounds so cliché (and NO I am not trying to apply for sainthood) but it’s the God’s honest truth.

I want to work in a place where I know the things that I am doing are for the betterment of someone or a cause.  You know the feeling you get when you help someone in dire need without a thought of receiving anything in return?  The sense of doing something favorable for purely selfless reasons and cracking that big inner smile in the process; you can do no wrong when you give of yourself to someone.

That’s what I want to feel; I want to smile more while working instead of being worried about deadlines.  Learning to have more empathy for those that are in a far worse predicaments than I am.  Strengthening my compassion towards strangers.  Spreading hope when there is none.  And enjoying life in the whole scheme of things.  Doing something that’s rewarding and feeling a sense of self-satisfaction at the end of the day is what I’m longing for.  Being able to do this would not only enrich my being but it would give meaning to my place in life.

Most recently, I have been applying at places of interest that do that sort of thing for quite some time…but unfortunately no luck.  But that did not deter my desire for achieving the goal of doing something worthwhile to satisfy my inner soul.

I’ve been tirelessly perusing sites where I can volunteer my time and make a difference.  The most eye opening aspect of this process is seeing the number of pages that the volunteer application forms contain.

Some even require medical documentations of past immunizations, past work history, references, reasons for volunteering and a mandatory commitment for your free services.  My how times have changed from when I did community service back in high school.

Even if this whole process is time consuming, my urge to really do something worthwhile and make a difference in someone’s life is all that matters.  My hope is that I can find the perfect fit and in doing so quench that burning inner desire.