Friends

Mid-Life Reflections #7

/ markmkane / Leave a comment

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We live in a hustle and bustle world where every minute of our lives is bombarded by things left and right.  There are times when chaos ensues and others that leave us completely dumbfounded.  Usually at the end of the day, we are completely exhausted both physically and mentally and end up sleeping it off only to continue with the hubbub the next day.

I’ve learned that too much exposure to all this commotion can sometimes cause us to  freak out and wonder “What the hell?!”

“Is this how it’ll be for the rest of my life?”

“Will it ever end?”

“What is my purpose in the scheme of it all?”

“Things have to get better right?”

All these questions must’ve popped into our minds at one point in time.  We’re either just starting to experience this, in the process of it or finally getting over it.  Whichever one we’re in, just know that in spite of everything, we need to stop and catch our breath.

Look around and take delight in your children, your pets, your siblings, your parents, your grandparents, your friends; just watch them and know that you are what you are because of them.

Watch the sunrise or the sunset; by doing this know that you are lucky enough to live another day.

If your life is not to your liking, change it.  It’s as simple as that.  Have a job that sucks, quit.  In a relationship that’s horrendous, end it.  Want to try something new, be fealess and go for it.  That cliche “Life is too short” is really true.

You got to where you are because you endured a lot and overcame obstacles that seemed insurmountable.  You can go much further and better yourself and situation if you just have faith in yourself.  Life is precious…so dare to be bold and custom life to your liking!

 

Spreading Sunshine

/ markmkane / 1 Comment

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As you go through life

be there for the people around you…

loved ones,

family,

friends,

those in need

Be the foundation for their support,

lend a shoulder to cry on,

give a big, tender hug,

share a warm, caring smile,

bring humor to the table

Displaying your light

with unabashed pride,

that’s how

you make everything better…

by

“spreading sunshine”

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To Live Another Day

/ markmkane / 2 Comments

Live

As I sit here in front of my computer

pondering life

and all its wondrous possibilities,

I can’t help but reminisce

about precious memories

shared with

family,

friends,

and loved ones

To have such treasured moments

is truly priceless

Knowing that a point in time

created feelings of

unbridled love,

pure joy

and non-stop laughter,

puts a smile on my face

To go through something that can’t

be recreated

is magical

But knowing that

the future presents opportunities

to experience similar feelings again

is what makes me

live for another day.

The Christmas Conundrum

/ markmkane / 1 Comment

Every day I marvel at the fact that I’m truly blessed to have such a wonderful family.  Yeah, we each have our faults, flaws and quirks AND we get on each other’s nerves, but at the end of the day that pales in comparison to the unwavering love and support we have for each other.  Why am I bringing this up you may ask?  At this time every year, I struggle to figure out what to get them for Christmas.  I wrack my brain knowing that I have no clue on where to start.  

So every year, I resort to doing what needs to be done.  The whole process boils down to me being a covert spy.  With a stoic expression, I nonchalantly ask them subtle questions about the things they look at in stores or online; narrowing down their top choices.  Hours pass, days even before I press on.  I ask them more questions without really tipping off my true intent; keenly watching their body language and gauging their emotions.  I take into account every word spoken, making mental checklists about their likes and dislikes.  And that’s usually enough for me to go on and buy their presents.

But there are also times when they don’t say much; even after asking prodding questions.  So in this instance, I resort to using each family member as an asset into retrieving the necessary information I need.  I endear them to my cause and then give them a set of questions to ask a family member.  They can ask however they want as long as they don’t reveal my true intent.  Surprisingly this tactic produces good results as well.

On rare instances when I end up with nothing, rather than buy them something that they won’t like, I’ll just sell out and give them money or gift cards.  I don’t usually like to do this because there is no personal touch but it’s better to give something rather than nothing at all.

The reason why I go through so much trouble is because I feel like I need to get them something really special to show my appreciation for all that they’ve done for me.  A simple hug or words of acknowledgement is usually the norm for most of the year, but at Christmas time, it’s the one time that I can really make them SMILE.  Even though they always say “You don’t really have to get me anything, I’m fine”, I still want to show them my gratitude.  Giving them something that they’ve always wanted really makes me feel good inside.  If I can feel that, then mission accomplished. 

The End of an Era

/ markmkane / 13 Comments

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When all things must come to an end

How do you say goodbye

to the friendships formed through years of…

laughter,

good times,

rough patches,

sorrow,

arguments

The bond that was created was unique,

one that can never be broken

A rapport that can never be extinguished

Is it possible to find that in the unknown?

A place where

you’re new,

vulnerable,

scared

Is there hope in finding

that special connection

with another person again?

One who’ll share

Your smiles,

sadness,

concerns,

fears,

joy,

You can never go back,

you can only cherish that special memory

of a past that you can no longer relive

You can only be grateful,

appreciative,

and carry on

By the grace of God,

with some luck,

you’ll stumble upon a new era

and experience new things

that will resemble the past.

The Cycle of Goodness

/ markmkane / 14 Comments

A1

When you perform a good deed for someone, whether it be family, friend or stranger, their look of expression exhibits gratitude.  Their appreciation for your generosity and kindness in giving of yourself and your time is reciprocated with a smile, a kiss, a hug, a handshake or words of thanks and praise.

And it’s a good feeling; it gives us a sense of self-satisfaction and prideful joy.  Because it feels good, almost intoxicating, we tend to do more good deeds.  As for the recipient of your actions, their positive experience compels them to try and do the same for others.  Spreading the wealth of selflessness…that’s the cycle of goodness.

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It’s the power to connect with people and let them know that there is good in the world and in everyone’s heart.  Seeing all those happy people and their smiles, truly makes one proud.  You can never forget the look on a person’s face when they express sincere gratitude and acknowledgement.

When we share an experience, a positive one at that, we form bonds.  Perpetuating the cycle of goodness, that’s the bond…the synergy of doing something exceptional for someone in a selfless manner.

We can all incorporate this into our daily lives.  A simple act can go a long way for someone in need.  We must never forget the power of the human heart…goodness is the key that can link the hearts of many.

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Living the “Aloha Spirit”

/ markmkane / 12 Comments

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Hawaii is unique in the sense that we really have a multi-cultural atmosphere; yes, every state and country has a melting pot culture as well but they’re not an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean with nowhere to go.

We are so isolated that the essence of good and stable relationships is important for collective existence.  We think of ourselves as one big community where we just find a way to live and work together.  We “talk story”, share customs and meals and influence each other.  We take what’s best from each other’s cultures and fuse them together to create this place.

The way we interact and treat one another is how the “Aloha Spirit” is spread.  It’s like an expression of kindness, hospitality, spirituality, cooperativeness, humility, unity and graciousness all rolled into one that we share with others, whether it be family, friends, acquaintances or strangers.

Whether you grew up here or a transplant from somewhere far, this attitude becomes engrained in your psyche.  It’s a part of our life; we treat everyone like family.  If you come here for a visit, just stop and look around.  You can’t miss it because it’s seen everywhere, every day.

 

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It’s the person that lets you cut into their lane during gridlocked rush hour, the next door neighbor that gives you fruits from their backyard, the people that come out in droves for a bone marrow drive for a family’s child, the person pulling over to help a stranger with a stranded vehicle on the freeway, the lady that welcomes a stranger with open arms at a party and treats them like a long-time friend, the guy that informs a tourist where the choice spots to go surfing or fishing and what to avoid, the feeling of trying to go above and beyond to help someone in need while being courteous in the process.

I could go on and on and give tons of examples but you get the picture; being hospitable is in every corner of the world.  I just wanted to give a brief light into what the “Aloha Spirit” was about.  Being tasked with explaining it through a blog was quite difficult for me because it’s just a way of life here.

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The “Aloha Spirit” is just spreading goodwill to everyone we meet; sharing a smile, helping out, being friendly, showing that we really care about you.  So if you get a chance, it doesn’t matter where you were born or where you’re currently living…maybe you could help spread the “Aloha Spirit” and increase the positivity in the world.

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To Be A Friend

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You make me smile

when I’m feeling down,

You chase away my problems,

make it hard for me to frown

Your wise advice,

though they maybe small

These are the ones

that help most of all

A watchful eye,

that’s alert and aware

of how I really feel,

whether good, bad, or fair

Thank you so much

for always being there

You give of your time

to show that you care

You give so much

to help me in life,

of the good things to expect

along with the stress and strife.

 

How Do I Define Myself

/ markmkane / 4 Comments

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How do I define myself?

It’s not through

exquisite jewelry,

expensive cars,

a spacious mansion,

a lavish lifestyle

or money

How do I define myself?

By leading a simple life of

love,

laughter,

hugs,

smiles,

hope,

and joy

How do I define myself?

Through years and years

of knowledge and experience,

filled with trials and tribulations,

both good and bad

shared with family,

friends,

acquaintances,

myself

How do I define my life?

By sharing a smile,

offering a helping hand,

lending an ear,

being with loved ones,

enjoying everything around me,

taking nothing for granted,

simply living for now.

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‘Tis The Season…

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With the holiday season fast approaching, I can’t help but get into the festive spirit.  Decorations at the office and at home were put up last week and adorned with the normal Christmas ornaments along with a few high tech modern ones. 

 Feeling upbeat and good-natured towards one another is at an all-time high; smiles are more frequently seen as well as laughter aplenty. Christmas music just fuels our inner core and harkens a time of simplicity and past innocence; when we believed that there truly was a Santa Claus.give10

Our somnolent consciousness reawakens and we’re transferred back to that very day when we were kids; eagerly counting down the days to when we can open all those presents under the Christmas tree.

 I look forward to this time of the year, guess mainly it’s because of the positive energy that’s flowing about.  Granted the stress of crowded malls, buying gifts, balancing our pocketbooks, finding parking and planning parties pop up but the vibe is just undeniable.  We subconsciously strive to be nicer toward others and compassionate toward those that are less fortunate.  It’s the season of “giving” after all.

I guess the whole point that I’m trying to get at is that there’s innate goodness in most of us; although we struggle with putting forth our best face throughout the year, this is the one time where it’s reassuring to know that we have the capability to be virtuous.   

The world is in a pressing state right now, so we need to more vigilant in spreading this positive energy. Not just for the holiday season, not just for a day, not just for a week but for as long as we can. 

So go forth and pay it forward; do everything with good intentions.  Spread your smile, give a hug, lend an ear, hold the door open for someone, any little thing helps.  Being charitable is a reward unto itself and the sense of self-satisfaction that comes from it is priceless.

Remember all the times when our family, friends, colleagues, strangers did something good for us –  that feeling we got from that unselfish act…we need to reciprocate that back to the world.