
Start of a new year
Many doors are now open
Possibilities
With eyes wide open
Our dreams are within our grasp
Time to fulfill them
Make your first step count
Take on the world without fear
Everlasting hope

Start of a new year
Many doors are now open
Possibilities
With eyes wide open
Our dreams are within our grasp
Time to fulfill them
Make your first step count
Take on the world without fear
Everlasting hope
Every day I marvel at the fact that I’m truly blessed to have such a wonderful family. Yeah, we each have our faults, flaws and quirks AND we get on each other’s nerves, but at the end of the day that pales in comparison to the unwavering love and support we have for each other. Why am I bringing this up you may ask? At this time every year, I struggle to figure out what to get them for Christmas. I wrack my brain knowing that I have no clue on where to start.
So every year, I resort to doing what needs to be done. The whole process boils down to me being a covert spy. With a stoic expression, I nonchalantly ask them subtle questions about the things they look at in stores or online; narrowing down their top choices. Hours pass, days even before I press on. I ask them more questions without really tipping off my true intent; keenly watching their body language and gauging their emotions. I take into account every word spoken, making mental checklists about their likes and dislikes. And that’s usually enough for me to go on and buy their presents.
But there are also times when they don’t say much; even after asking prodding questions. So in this instance, I resort to using each family member as an asset into retrieving the necessary information I need. I endear them to my cause and then give them a set of questions to ask a family member. They can ask however they want as long as they don’t reveal my true intent. Surprisingly this tactic produces good results as well.
On rare instances when I end up with nothing, rather than buy them something that they won’t like, I’ll just sell out and give them money or gift cards. I don’t usually like to do this because there is no personal touch but it’s better to give something rather than nothing at all.
The reason why I go through so much trouble is because I feel like I need to get them something really special to show my appreciation for all that they’ve done for me. A simple hug or words of acknowledgement is usually the norm for most of the year, but at Christmas time, it’s the one time that I can really make them SMILE. Even though they always say “You don’t really have to get me anything, I’m fine”, I still want to show them my gratitude. Giving them something that they’ve always wanted really makes me feel good inside. If I can feel that, then mission accomplished.

Looking back on everything I’ve done in my life, whether it be good or bad, there are definitely things that I would’ve done very differently. But I guess that’s how we all would feel if given the power of hindsight. Some would say that what we did was supposed to happen in order for us to learn a lesson or set us on the right path to where we’re going to end up.
For someone like me who’s a control freak, especially when it comes to my choice of jobs, it’s truly frustrating when you’ve made a bad choice. After making that critical decision, whether intentionally, hastily or ill-informed, it feels like an eternity trying to get my life back on track. Everything seems to be in overdrive just to get back to normalcy; but now every turn, every move I make I second guess myself.
“I shouldn’t have done this!”
“What the hell was I thinking?!”
“What have I gotten myself into?!”
“Am I going to get out of this jam? And when!?”
All these thoughts run a continuous loop in my head and I beat myself up over making that error in judgement. We’re all human, but I have high expectations of myself and feel like the whole world just came crashing down on me. I feel trapped with no option in sight.
We talk to our family and friends about our predicament to get their advice but it turns into a therapy session where we pour our hearts out in hopes of a quick and easy solution. We’ve all been there…and we’ll all go there again.
The one thing that keeps me afloat is the prospect of something better on the horizon. Yeah, I don’t know how long it’ll take to reach that destination but the idea of finding something better keeps that hope alive. AND I always hold out for hope! I always err on the side of positivity. Why? Because at my lowest point, that’s all I can do. It’s much better than the alternative; I can’t just give up. Throwing in the towel and being resigned to the fact that I failed somehow is not an option.
There is always a way out of every predicament I put myself in. Strength and faith is all I need to have to know that it’ll all work out in the end. Nothing’s impossible to overcome, I just have to be willing to take the first step forward…AND I just did.

What do you do
when the carrot that’s been dangling
in front of you
gets ripped away
It’s like a punch to the gut
that just sucks the life out of you
Your whole world turns
upside down
Where do you go from here?
How do you cope?
Your battle worn
mind, body and soul
wants to give up
and throw in the towel
But your heart refuses
It is life!
No matter what,
it knows that you are made of sterner stuff
It pumps hope into your core
The source that keeps you alive
that wills you to move forward
past the disappointment,
and the pain
It becomes a shot of adrenaline
that courses through your very fiber
that makes your determination,
your drive
ten times stronger than it was before
and gives you the resolve
to take on greater things
and gives you a true sense of peace
knowing that you’ll overcome
the next disappointment
with strength and inner confidence
and a heart that can
truly stand the test of time.

Patience…
is what it takes to the path of
your dreams, your goals
Patience…
is a virtue they say
but to me it’s a test
Patience…
challenges your hopes,
your strength of will,
your endurance to bear
the uncomfortableness of it all
So that the light at the end of the tunnel
shines big and bright
like the radiant sun
And all the riches of your hopes and dreams
are there for your taking
So relish the moments
that require patience…
for it truly is a valued trait.

While channel surfing couple years ago, I happened upon a channel that featured a 2014 movie called “A Most Violent Year”. Although I consider myself a movie buff, I’ve never really heard of this movie until that one fateful day. I won’t tell you what the plot was because I stumbled upon it and really didn’t watch it till the end. But I did happen upon a scene where a man by the name of Abel Morales said “When it feels scary to jump, that is exactly when you jump, otherwise you end up staying in the same place your whole life.”
This one line totally resonated with me and I just had to write it down. I turned off the TV and soaked in those words. I took it to heart and it quickly became etched within my subconscious. You could almost say that I had an epiphany of some sorts.
This one quote, this one line from a movie I have never seen told me that in life, you need to take chances regardless of the outcome. There are times when you’ll succeed and there are times when you’ll fail, but you must learn from it in order to grow into the person that you were meant to be. Life is too short to play is safe, it needs to be explored with eyes wide open. Life if full of endless possibilities with the potential to be great.
I took this to heart and felt that I needed to try anything even if it took me out of my comfort zone. I lived by the code of being open to different things; doing so would broaden my horizons both mentally and physically. Living by this way of thinking helped me to try different things; just facing the impossible or the uncomfortable with complete abandonment. Living this way made me realize that to do these things require both strength and faith; the will to pursue what your heart desires with the self-confidence to know that you’ll achieve something positive from it regardless of the results.
Ever since then, I’ve been bestowed with nothing but great outcomes. I dared to take a chance and came out a winner so to speak; I count my blessings everyday for doing so. So if you are faced with doing something that takes you out of your comfort zone, go all in and bet on yourself. The first step will be scary, terrifying even…but the end results will be much more rewarding. Take that leap and dare to be great!

I am truly honored and appreciative of the fact that I was nominated for the Liebster Award by Haylee. I had stumbled across her log one day and was pleasantly surprised by her posts…most especially her poems. They are simple, profound and touch on life experiences that we all encountered at some point in our lives. If you get the chance, check out her site: stumblingaboutourworld.wordpress.com
You’ll be pleasantly surprised as I was.
1. What is the most extreme thing that I’ve done?
When I was in college, I hiked along the entire ridge of Diamond Head. Which I’m glad I did because now they do not permit anyone to do so because of the dangerous conditions.
2. Out of all the places I visited, which did I like the most?
I really like Hawaii (also known as the “Big Island”) . I got the opportunity to see an active volcano, walk on solid lava, got to go to the top of Mauna Kea, experienced the black sand beach as well as the green sand beach and saw many historical Hawaiian sites.
3. What is on of my favorite memories?
The birth of my daughter Chloe and my son Conor. It truly was an experience that surpasses anything and everything that I encountered or will encounter.
4. Why did I decide to start my blog?
It was on the advice of my literary manager but in the end it was my passion for writing and sharing my inner voice for the world to see.
5. What is my favorite book or book series?
“Writing Movies For Fun And Profit or How We Made A Billion Dollars at the Box Office and You Can, Too!” by Robert Ben Garant & Thomas Lennon
6. Do I have a post (one of my own) that you favor over others?
The one that I liked best was a post called “Our Special Gift” :
midlifemaniacalme.me/?s=our+special+gift
7. If I could go anywhere in the world and take one person, who would it be and why?
I would go and see Japan with my wife because she is my everything – the love of my life, my best friend, the foundation of our family, strong, smart and a fighter.
8. If I were given $500 today, what would I do with it and why?
If given a $500 today, I would spend it on a dinner for my parents because of all they’ve done for me. They’ve taught me the values of life, helped shaped the person into who I am today.
9. What inspires me to write?
It’s just a passion that I’ve had for the past 27 years. The joy I get from writing anything totally frees me and lets my inner voice be heard and shared with both strangers and all of my blogging colleagues.
10. What is my opinion on the advancement of technology?
I think that it’s great. A lot of what we do and see whether it be writing, seeing something is all instantaneous. It’s truly convenient.
I had a hard time trying to determine what blogs I was going to nominate because I follow so many great ones. The ones that particularly stuck out were the ones that touched me, inspired me, made me laugh and provoke thought. These blogs are written by the people who provide encouraging words and have the gift of prose. They really don’t need my help in sending people their way because so many people have found them already. But on the off chance you haven’t stumbled across them, please check them out..you won’t be disappointed.